Puppy

I always knew that raising a child would be hard work, but I never knew exactly how hard it could be at times. It seems to be that the things that seem so trivial are actually the things that are the hardest emotionally. If you had told me years ago that I would be crying over a stuffed animal, I would have laughed in disbelief.

Owen has a stuffed puppy named "Puppy." That dog goes everywhere with him, sleeps with him, comforts him, and entertains him by enduring intensive abuse. Puppy has been swimming in the pool, plunged in the toilet, covered in peanut butter and sticky candy goo, and launced full force out of a crib at high speeds. If I were this toy, I would have ran away a long time ago. However, as mean as he can be to Puppy, Owen loves him dearly. Whenever he is upset, hurt or sleepy, it is Puppy who is always there to comfort him.

The first time Owen grabbed Puppy, nestled him into his arms and rolled over on his tummy to go to sleep, my husband and I looked at each other and said, "Ahhhhh!" It was the sweetest moment we had experienced as parents. Well, one of the many. Seeing your child love someone or something else is a wonderful, human experience. For one thing, it shows that this "sometimes little monster" truly does have feelings.

This past Thursday evening turned out to be a very emotional time for our family. I have been through some very hard times in my life, but this was the first time that I had to experience my child truly suffering, and it was very difficult for me. It may sound silly, since it was over Owen's Puppy, but I realized that when it comes to my child and his emotional well-being, nothing is silly when he is suffering.

That Thursday night, Puppy had the horrible experience of having his face eaten off by one of my mom's dogs. Owen found him and, being confused, starting pulling the stuffing out of his face. My mom, stepdad and I all yelled, knowing the implications of this event. Our shouts caused Owen to cry. I picked up Puppy and his remains as I surveyed the damage. One eye was till intact, and I was able to locate the other, along with part of his nose and most of the stuffing. One of his ears had been ripped in two, and there was a huge gaping hole where his little smiling face once had been. This was not good. I hid the body and parts until my mom could perform surgery.

At dinner, we were all upset about Puppy. We all knew how important he was to Owen, and we wondered how well he would sleep that night. After dinner, as I got Owen ready to go home, we all participated in distracting him so he wouldn't begin asking for Puppy. This worked until I began strapping him into his carseat and he became upset and started fighting with me. "Puppy! Puppy!" My heart sank. "Puppy's at the doctor, honey. He will be back tomorrow," was all I could say. The ride home was excruciating, listening to him call out Puppy's name while he cried all the way home.

When we got home, he looked for Puppy everywhere. Apparently, I keep everything in my purse because he even looked for him in my purse. He ran into his room and looked in his crib, on the rocking chair, on the changing table, under the changing table, everywhere he could think of. I had two stuffed dogs that my mom had given me years ago. I grabbed those hoping that he would accept them for the night, and he did. He smiled and hugged the two toys as he gripped them tightly to him. I thought I had fixed everything and that he would be okay without Puppy.

Although, he accepted these two new dogs, he had not forgotten his true friend. As soon as I went to lay him down in his crib, he immediately remembered that Puppy was gone and he began crying uncontrollably and calling his name. I held Owen closely to me and tried to calm him, but nothing worked. I had never seen him so upset before. I could not console him, and there was nothing left for me to do but to put him in his crib and leave the room. I shut his door and listened to him cry for over thirty minutes for Puppy. It was horrible. I stood on the other side of his door and began to cry. I was not crying for Puppy, but for my son's pain at missing his best friend. Eventually, Owen stopped crying and was able to go to sleep.

My mother, the miracle worker, performed reconstructive surgery on Puppy's face that night, and he made it through. The surgery went wonderfully and, although Puppy now only has one eye, my mom was able to salvage most of his nose, repair the hole and stitch up his split ear. At first she was afraid she would have to do some fur grafting in order to have enough material to patch up the hole, but she was able to mend the wound without having to do so. Despite the trauma, Puppy looks great. That poor dog has been through so much in his little life.

The next morning, when he arrived at my mom's house, Owen was glad to see his Puppy. Immediately, he knew something was different, and he began touching his nose and examining him. At first he rejected his new face, but after a few minutes he ran back and grabbed him up in his little arms and acted as if the night before had not happened.

I am so glad that Puppy's face was able to be saved, and that we are able to get back to normal. Now, my family and I have decided that we have to be more aware of exactly where Puppy is at so that this does not happen again. Friday night, we ate dinner with Puppy on the table right where we could see him. I cannot take another emotional night listening to my child's sobs while I feel helpless.

Of course, I know this will not be the last time that I have to see Owen in pain, but at least this time it was over his beloved ragged Puppy and not some carless girl who has broken his heart. Hopefully I've got a little while before that happens.